Some place far away

aww-blush- :)

So we’ve been talking every night for like the past month.. and today we talked all day :)

we told each other about our horoscopes, he’s an Aquarius and im a Scorpio!

he said he knew i was mysterious.. and he just wanted to know everything about me.. but i don’t know how to tell him shesh.. he just has to be more attentive?

and while he told me his, i asked if he was actually adventurous and liked challenges and he said “Lol it depends though… Like the horoscope said… I would go out of the way for people hehe”

and then i asked him about the party he was at, and he mentioned that they had really yummy foods and I wanted some so i said “shareee :)” and he said “How about you come over Cause the food here is for everyone hehehe”, “soo farrr haha and i only know you so awkward x(“, “Lol but….. That means I will spend more time with you then hehehe to get you comfortable”

we talked about how we never really talk in person although we both want to change that, he’s just shy.. 

although i dont think im that shy of a person, i’m shy around him :\

i told him i’d try to talk to him thursday during their scrimmage :D

he called me cute for being so miny, for laughing a lot, when i gravitated toward him whenever i shanked on saturday x.x, and when i poked him randomly haha

He’s really a sweetheart~ he knew it took me a little time to fall asleep so he just said he would stay up 5-7 minutes waiting for me to sleep.. okay goodnight!

his smile is adorable :) ..& snoodles<3

teeheeehee

i have to admit, he stole my heart :x

my shyness :’(

struggle to find myself and my modivation for volleyball.. for life.
this fucking sucks.

I’m a dork :’)

Rise and shine
Little friend of mines
Get to work
And don’t be such a dork :)
You are fine as you are
Which will get you far
So do your best
And you will get the rest ( of anything.. Idk lol I didn’t think it through until I wrote it)
Good
Morning
Sincerely,
Anonymous :)

I totally didn’t expect this… I just though oh he’s a really nice and chill.. and cute and adorable.. But since we started talking I think I totally fell for your dorky-ness haha. He’s so sweet and encouraging, hilarious, and when he plays it brings out a whole different side of him that isn’t shy or anything at all.. cute :)

..I wish we talked more in real life.. like saturdays during practice but I’m such a looser LOL :\

Screw you. even though this is out of anger. I’m still furious.

” Lol, I don’t even check if your on or not xD I just know >:). Lol but I’ll just send random things if your on or not haha, keep doing your work ^.^”

oh i’m blushing..

he’s so easy to talk to.. he’s encouraging.. he’s funny.. he’s a sweetheart…… and he distracts me from homework which is good! gosh x.x I hate my homeworrkk.. LOL

I want to get to know him better :)

I always feel like everyone’s last resort..

Why does everyone always talk to me when there’s no one else :’(

It makes me feel like I’m not good enough..

I’m not.

I think he’s cute…

but after what she said I don’t see why he would find me interesting. She’s so nice, so pretty, so fun and awesome.. while I was just sitting there.. there’s no competition.

I have no confidence.

.. reasons but no explanation.

When I first said I had allergies because I had redish eyes or a runny nose, I was lying. It wasn’t even really my allergy season. It’s just a good excuse to hide tears. Everything around me seems to be falling down and I can’t do anything about it. I feel so worthless in this world.

I could try but it’s all too late.. well. Yeah. for those who read this don’t come up to me and say “are u okay?” because I don’t want to break down in front of everyone.. even though I am slowly inside..

I can’t eat or sleep anymore and I’m getting weaker and weaker..

I don’t know how I’m gonna pull myself out of this..

You say this has nothing to do with me, It has EVERYTHING to to with me.

I’m sick.. I need help.

Upenn.

My dream school happens to be the best at college volleyball. I have to step up my game huh? haha :)

I have to prioritize my life.

I’m going to give up on Wolfpack… and go only whenever John ask me or something.. and focus on Leaders.

Take Vball and Running more seriously. Work on my arms more.

And school. Approbation B minimum. I give up getting my g.p.a to get higher this year. This summer has to be full of studying and hard work.

so i guess i have to say goodbye to my dreams of being an officer of wolfpack volunteers. sorry eddy :(

-reality check that i’m nothing compared to him.

I do like him huh? I’m scared of the pain again.. Please don’t hurt me.